I look on and see how impossibly hard all of life has become for you right now, and I have only a glimpse of how it must feel.
My reading tells me how important your work is to you. How devastating it must be then, during this difficult season. And yet, when I look on, I have hope. I see hard circumstances, and I'm relieved that you are the man in the middle of them. You have an amazing track record of pulling miracles out of a hat. You've never given up, you've always searched and found a solution that far exceeded what I could have hoped in every rough spot that's come before us. I have faith in your perseverance and your cleverness, I have faith that it will all work out.
I've experienced being dumped on, and breaking things off. In those dark times, I knew it was all about me, and I was a mess. Here you are, at the very beginning of grief, feeling the hurt of loss and separation; but it wasn't you, she's the mess right now. I've no idea how hard it was to have to let go. I respect you so much for the love you have shown and continue to show. I admire the lengths to which you were willing to go, how much you were willing to endure before you had to end it. I can't replace her. I can't be her. But I'm here, and I'm ready to be by your side when you ask it.
I can't imagine what it must be like to be this sick. You have always been so strong, so healthy. I've always admired your athletic skill and willingness to work hard physically. You are still so strong. You have carried on against each obstacle, living life as normally as possible as the physical challenges pile up. It's easy to lose hope in tomorrow when the fight for today gets so tough. What you don't see is that I know you will survive this fight, that you will come through it stronger and be an inspiration for others. Years from now, you will look back in wonder at all that you overcame.
Right now, while it's dark and gloomy, I will be your hope. I will keep your spirit safe for you and return it to you when you're ready for it. I can be your hope, because I see the you that you're denying right now. Strong, loving and determined. You are beloved, but even more so, you are admired and respected and appreciated.
With love and respect,
Because so often, it's not about me.
The preceding has been my entry for LJ Idol Season 5, Topic 10, YOU'RE SO VAIN - YOU PROBABLY THINK THIS TOPIC IS ABOUT YOU.