Sloughing off the negative by writing about it always helps. Get the words out, whine and rant and vent, then be matter-of-fact and to-the-point when the conversation comes.
Again.
Tigger is not ordinary. I mean, it's not like he's from Mars or anything, and I'm not seeing a Curious Incident in the offing. But he's just not quite.
normal?
Like, really there is such a thing?
The sweaters are not against dress code. And seriously, they trap more odor than they produce. I understand the mechanism. And there are three orange ones. Honest.
No, of course there is no way in heck I am even suggesting deodorant.
What do you do with a super-smeller whose best line of defense against the world around him is his own familiar, comfortable smell? A boy off of whom any amount of teasing would just plain slide, like water off a duck?
One new alarm setting coming up: Remind Tigger to shower. Sunday, Tuesday, Thursday. Cause Sunday-Wednesday might have been working, but it leaves no wiggle room for forgetfulness.
Can we just revel right now, in the fact that all of his assignments are in on time, he's awake and alert in the morning? No, you don't want to know that he has to "drug" himself with melatonin to sleep in the very unnatural (to him) nighttime; you don't want to know that he can concentrate in class because his own smell blocks out the pollens and the molds from outside, and the stinking deodorants and artificial scents wafting from his classmates, the perfumes that follow his teachers.
Do I tell them that I haven't used shampoo for months? Offer up my own, natural, clean scent for an example that soothes rather than ruffles my own child?
Five More Days of School.
Five More Days of School.
Five More Days of School.
Five More Days of School.
no, the school doesn't offer showers to the kids until high school. they do dress out for gym, but he plays hard in recess, too.
Five More Days of School.
Five More Days of School.
1) A clean towel each time you shower.
2) Deodorant soap. (We used Lever as it didn't upset our sensitive skin.)
3) Change bedding weekly, and this means ALL of it, unless the comforter doesn't touch the skin much at night. If that's the case, the dermatologist told us once a month is fine.
4) Vacuum the mattress at least every other week. If it's a futon, get rid of it and replace it with a regular mattress until past the odoriferous years.
5) We had a hard time with deodorants. They stopped working every couple of weeks, and she could only wear a few of them without getting a rash. I bought her deodorant talc, and she smelled GREAT!
6) Baking soda in the wash with the stinky sweaters, or take them to the dry cleaner. For us, it was a hoodie issue, so baking soda worked. She wasn't allowed to wear the same one more than three days without it going in the wash. (Jeans had a two day rule.)
7) No loofahs, body puffs, etc. We had a stylist at an Aveda salon analyze her hair and then recommend the best shampoo for getting her scalp clean without drying her locks out.
8) Lastly- and this was the hardest one- we explained to her that we expected her to take this seriously because it was an important part of being polite. She learned to say, "please," and "thank you-" she could learn to stink as little as possible as part of having good manners, too.
Good luck- I feel for you on this one!
My daughter had the same problem with the "scents" of school. I heard some schools are going to ban body sprays and heavily scented deodorants.
He is constantly bombarded, sensually, with light, pollen and other natural spring smells, artificially generated smells in everything from soap to perfume, and that's before you even touch on sounds. His body was shutting down rather than deal with blocking out so much, and the biggest clue was that he was so easily awake at night, when there was just less to deal with.
He takes melatonin to force his body to sleep at night, and he "hides" in his own smell. He's awake in the mornings now, and stays alert in class. I call it an improvement.
I'm willing to ask him to bathe more often; willing to demand he change outer clothes (he's been changing shirt, underwear and socks daily) more often. I already use Borax on the towels and I can start using it on the sweaters - but honestly, his sweaters don't smell. Mind you, this call was brought on because he forgot to shower Wednesday. Thus, an increase in shower frequency and adding a phone alarm to remember what time of night to remind him.
The teachers always TRY to use the "other kids will tease him" card, but honestly? They. Don't. Care.
Five More Days.
Five More Days.
Five More Days.
Edited at 2008-05-16 07:31 pm (UTC)
Turns out he was using bubble bath on his hair after he washed it, and he wasn't rinsing it out well, either. I wanted to slap that lady, though. Wench.
I didn't get on my daughter about the stuff I listed until high school, at which point, she needed to address it before heading out into the job market, and because her room smelled so bad that it made the entire upstairs smell off.
BTW, peer insults rolled off of her back, too, and I used to use that same analogy.
You've had more than your share of things to deal with lately. I'm still sending lots of good vibes and cheer your way. Only five more days, and then you can have a party! ;o)
*hug*
Tomorrow, I get to have a yard sale.
And oh! My closets swish again.
I *so* need to clean out my closets... *sigh*
Hopefully the 3x/week showers will work for him; he might also try showering when he gets up instead of before bed, since many people are stimulated by a shower rather than relaxed. Also, some of us (myself included) sweat during sleep, so he'd actually be cleaner in the morning for school if he showers in the morning instead.
It *says* don't apply right after you shower, but I've not found a problem as long as I haven't shaved and I'm sensitive to pretty much everything. Give the skin a few minutes to recover from hot soapy water, and it should be ok.