October 6th, 2004



yesterday i was down. no reason. i got to spend the day bowling, with Knight, with Spydie, with the kids at Chess Club, with Flar, with Ro. it was hectic. Usually that means no time to be sad. i cried last night. no reason. worried. i can't remember being sad for no reason for a long time now. don't want the moods to turn.

my brain trains in maze crawls. hello, ended this dead-end-cycling-worry last night with a pre-sleep intention to check my journal this morning.

eh voila. last mood entry: Sep 8. subdued, wondering if the progesterone is playing a role.



calling the doctor today. the ear doctor, cause my left ear is still draining. my OB/Gyn to consult about going off the progesterone.

limited net reading confirms progesterone's involvement in mood dips, suggests to my brain-logic that stopping may induce an early period.

wanna check out logistics, what to watch for physically that's bad enough to merit a week of feeling down to prevent -- how much heavy bleeding is too much, etc. But i'd rather bleed than cry.
  • Current Mood
    worried down